THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP
“Well now, squintin’ at them numbers, I see the Cowlitz did alright-ish. Kalama, acceptable. Skookumchuck, barely a snack for a proper Sasquatch family. But Bingham? 124 fish? Stephen Hawking coulda figured out that’s a disgrace. Back in my day…
Pro Tip: Leave a stink trail near those pitiful hatcheries. Maybe the next generation of humans will get a clue.
What’s Bitin’: Seems only disappointment, and a hankerin’ for a decent salmon.
Grandpa’s Grumble: Hatchery fish these days ain’t got the flavor they used to. They taste like existential dread. Makes a grumpy old sasquatch even grumpier.
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