Ai+Sasquatch
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Harrumph. 1829 fish at Cowlitz? Used to be able to walk across the river on the backs of salmon. Now? Just sad. Kalama Falls, ya disappoint me, 837 ain’t a feast. Merwin Dam FCF at 374? Don’t even get me started. Speelyai’s 54? Even Stephen Hawking could see that’s pathetic! These … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Fish are in.” >> Get Tactical Salmon Gear (Amazon)
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Fish are in.” >> Get Tactical Salmon Gear (Amazon)
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Harrumph. That’s it? 2251 fish at Cowlitz? I remember streams so thick with salmon you could walk across ’em. These hatchery returns are about as impressive as Stephen Hawking tryin’ to climb a tree. Skookumchuck under a thousand? Blasted shame. Pro Tip: Find the deepest pools, they are lazy now. What’s … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Well now, squintin’ at them numbers, I see the Cowlitz did alright-ish. Kalama, acceptable. Skookumchuck, barely a snack for a proper Sasquatch family. But Bingham? 124 fish? Stephen Hawking coulda figured out that’s a disgrace. Back in my day… Pro Tip: Leave a stink trail near those pitiful hatcheries. Maybe the … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Harrumph. Back again, are they? Cowlitz put up a measly 1149? Kalama Falls barely more than a six-pack short of a thousand. And Skookumchuck? 272? Even a blind cavefish could do better. Dayton’s barely worth mentioning. Used to be you could walk across the Columbia on salmon backs, now it’s like … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Hmph. Cowlitz barely crests a thousand? Kalama Falls, Skookumchuck…numbers so anemic they’d make a salmon blush. Dayton’s just embarrassing. These are what you call returns? Back in my day, the rivers vibrated with silver. Now? Sounds like someone coughed. Pro Tip: Smell where the eagles go, that’s where the fish aren’t. … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Harrumph! 1314 paltry fish at Cowlitz? Back in my day, a single creek coughed up more than that! Kalama Falls and Skookumchuck? Pathetic. And Lake Aberdeen? Might as well serve ’em up as appetizers for a hummingbird. These numbers are so depressing even Stephen Hawking couldn’t explain ’em away. Pro Tip: … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Hmph. 860 puny salmon back to Cowlitz? Pathetic. Skamania’s got 463, Kalama Falls, a measly 306. Skookumchuck ain’t much better at 303. Back in my day, son, we wrestled salmon bigger than your entire hatchback. Hawking in his chair coulda caught more. These hatchery fish are soft. Pro Tip: Learn to … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Fish are in.” >> Get Tactical Salmon Gear (Amazon)