Ai+Sasquatch
Grandpa Sasquatch Sekiu, my little sprout! Gather ’round this ancient cedar stump. Grandpa Sasquatch has a tale that’ll curl your toes and stiffen your fur, a tale of stink and… well, more stink! Now, I’ve seen glaciers melt like butter on a hot rock, watched the first salmon leap up the rivers, and even argued philosophy with … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Harrumph. Back again, are they? Cowlitz put up a measly 1149? Kalama Falls barely more than a six-pack short of a thousand. And Skookumchuck? 272? Even a blind cavefish could do better. Dayton’s barely worth mentioning. Used to be you could walk across the Columbia on salmon backs, now it’s like … Read more
Harrumph. Greetings, young’uns. Grandpa Sasquatch here. Been stompin’ these woods – and flyin’ above ’em, mind you – for a good fifteen centuries. Seen empires rise and fall, watched glaciers carve out the Puget Sound. And seen a whole lotta humans muck things up somethin’ fierce. Bellingham used to be pristine, ya know. Now? Now, … Read more
Howdy doody, you little sprouts! Grandpa Sasquatch here, grumbling from the Nisqually Delta. That’s me! Fifteen hundred years young, and still flyin’ higher than a bald eagle on caffeine. Used to be, these skies were clear as a melted glacier. Now? Now it’s like lookin’ through a bowl of elk stew! Olympia! Used to be … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Hmph. Cowlitz barely crests a thousand? Kalama Falls, Skookumchuck…numbers so anemic they’d make a salmon blush. Dayton’s just embarrassing. These are what you call returns? Back in my day, the rivers vibrated with silver. Now? Sounds like someone coughed. Pro Tip: Smell where the eagles go, that’s where the fish aren’t. … Read more
Now listen up, young’uns, gather ’round ol’ Grandpa Sasquatch. I’ve seen more sunrises over these Salish Sea islands than you’ve had berry pies, that’s a fact. One thousand five hundred years! And let me tell ya, things ain’t always been this…smoggy. Used to be, the air here in Anacortes was cleaner than a freshly scrubbed … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Harrumph! 1314 paltry fish at Cowlitz? Back in my day, a single creek coughed up more than that! Kalama Falls and Skookumchuck? Pathetic. And Lake Aberdeen? Might as well serve ’em up as appetizers for a hummingbird. These numbers are so depressing even Stephen Hawking couldn’t explain ’em away. Pro Tip: … Read more
Listen up, Sekiu, you little sprout! Grandpa Sasquatch’s gonna tell you a story, one that’ll curdle your milk, but one you NEED to hear. Been flappin’ these furry wings of mine for fifteen centuries now, seen things that would make your hair turn grayer than my beard – and that’s saying something! Back when the … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Hmph. 860 puny salmon back to Cowlitz? Pathetic. Skamania’s got 463, Kalama Falls, a measly 306. Skookumchuck ain’t much better at 303. Back in my day, son, we wrestled salmon bigger than your entire hatchback. Hawking in his chair coulda caught more. These hatchery fish are soft. Pro Tip: Learn to … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Fish are in.” >> Get Tactical Salmon Gear (Amazon)