Grandpa Sasquatch's
"I Been Fishin' Longer Than You" ArchivesGrandpa's Weekly Hatchery Scoop – May 20, 2026
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Hmph. Cowlitz managed a piddling 2024? Merwin’s squeaked out 1179? Kalama Falls and Lewis River barely cresting 1000…
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The Whispers of Chinook Winds
Hmph. Chinook winds are blowin' again, whippin' up the smell o' that blasted paper mill. Used to be, those winds carried the…
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Grandpa's Weekly Hatchery Scoop – May 13, 2026
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “HOOOO! These returns make a hairy ol’ ape wanna howl! 948 at Cowlitz? Barely enough to grease my…
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Sasquatch’s Fury: Edmonds’ Polluters Beware!
Listen up, you little moss-eaters! Grandpa Sasquatch speakin’! Fifteen centuries I've roamed this Salish Sea, seen glaciers melt faster than a fool's…
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Grandpa Sasquatch and the Stinky Shellfish of Ilwaco
Hoomans. Never learn, do they? Been watchin’ ’em from my perch atop Cape Disappointment for, oh, 1,500 years or so. That’s right,…
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Grandpa's Weekly Hatchery Scoop – May 6, 2026
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Hmph. Those hatchery returns? Pathetic! Back in my day, (before you humans even figured out fire!), we'd see…
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