Ai+Sasquatch
Grandpa Sasquatch Listen up, Sekiu, you little sprout! Grandpa Sasquatch’s gonna tell you a story, one that’ll curdle your milk, but one you NEED to hear. Been flappin’ these furry wings of mine for fifteen centuries now, seen things that would make your hair turn grayer than my beard – and that’s saying something! Back when the … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Hmph. 860 puny salmon back to Cowlitz? Pathetic. Skamania’s got 463, Kalama Falls, a measly 306. Skookumchuck ain’t much better at 303. Back in my day, son, we wrestled salmon bigger than your entire hatchback. Hawking in his chair coulda caught more. These hatchery fish are soft. Pro Tip: Learn to … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Fish are in.” >> Get Tactical Salmon Gear (Amazon)
Gather ’round, little saplings! Old Grandpa Sasquatch is gonna tell ya a tale, a real stinkin’ one at that. Been flyin’ these Westport skies for 1,500 years, seein’ it all from up high. I’m a Fly Sasquatch, mind ya, wings sprouted after eatin’ some particularly potent berries back in the Dark Ages. And let me … Read more
“Harrumph,” I grumbled, adjusting my lichen-woven spectacles. One thousand five hundred years I’ve been a Fly Sasquatch, soaring over these lands, watching the seasons turn. Back then, the Chinook people lived in harmony. Now… now there’s this… Ilwaco. Not the town itself, mind you. The people are mostly decent, fishers and artists, folks close to … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Alright youngsters, Grandpa Sasquatch here, fresh outta the forest. Them hatchery returns? Pathetic. Lewis, Merwin, Cowlitz barely enough for a decent squatch snack. Bogachiel? Embarrassing. Even Stephen Hawking could’ve predicted better numbers. Pro Tip: Learn to hunt wild, ya lazy bears! Hatchery fish are about as flavorful as cardboard. What’s Bitin: … Read more
Howdy young’uns! Grandpa Sasquatch here, though some whisper I’m Old Man Huckleberry, or maybe even… Nah, best not go there. Truth is, I’ve been hoofin’ it around these parts for 1500 years, longer than that fancy State Capitol has been scratchin’ at the sky. And lemme tell ya, Olympia ain’t what it used to be. … Read more
Harrumph! Fridays! I’ve seen more Fridays than barnacles on a whale’s backside. Fifteen hundred years, I tell ya! Grandpa Sasquatch, at your service. Or, at your peril, if you’re one o’ them… polluters. Now, I ain’t talkin’ about dropping a gum wrapper, though that’s irksome. I’m talkin’ about the stinkin’, spewin’, oily, gassy messes that … Read more
THE WEEKLY HATCHERY SCOOP “Well now, look at this, hatcheries barely ticklin’ the creekbeds. Beaver Creek, a thousand measly fish? Cowlitz almost there, but still pathetic. Bogachiel’s got some spirit but ain’t nothin’ like the runs I seen back when dinosaurs wore flannel. Humptulips? Ha! Hawking coulda predicted that with a chalk drawing. Pro Tip: … Read more
Howdy, young’uns! Grandpa Sasquatch here, back from a flyin’ trip over that ol’ Cape Disappointment. Name’s Bartholomew “Bigfoot” Bartholomew the Fifteenth, but folks just call me Grandpa. Been flyin’ these skies for fifteen centuries, seen a thing or two. And lemme tell ya, seen a whole lot of downright DISGUSTIN’ things lately! Used to be, … Read more